Romance novels, nudity, comedy, skirts. These are great ways to speed up your sex drive, but they’re not enough. These things are fine if you like them, but it makes people struggle and it’s not because there isn’t enough throttle push – it’s that there’s a lot of brake booster.
Nothing triggers your brakes more than stress. Anxiety is a survival mechanism to help you when your body is sending you signals that you are insecure right now and if you are insecure now is it a good time to have sex?
No matter how hard you try to kick things up a notch, chronic stress can completely suppress your libido. Work, childcare, and lack of sleep are just a few of the things that can get in your way.
For many long-term couples, the pressure to maintain consistent sex is a major source of stress, and ironically, it’s often the reason they don’t have it all the time. Here are some strategies couples can use to speed up their work.
1. Schedule for sex
Couples who are happy and in long-term relationships often make sex a priority and even include it in their schedule.
Some people hear that and think, well, that’s not really romantic. How can your partner possibly want you if they’re going to make it up? But are there things we do in our lives that are important to us that we don’t plan for?
Planning sex gives you time to clear any stress that is holding you back, whether its stress related to work or home hygiene. There is a time of preparation where you can do whatever it takes to reduce your stress level or heat your fever.
2. Avoid “chasing dynamic”
You want sex. Your partner no. And so, it is. Often when a partner wants to have sex, it is not a desire for pleasure – it is a need for intimacy. They want connection, they want acceptance, they want to be wanted by their partner, and it can be scary when your partner says “no”. What are they saying no to? Do they just say they won’t have sex or are they telling me everything?
If your partner isn’t interested, don’t think it’s because he doesn’t like you. They may not have finished yet.
It is not true for a partner to say no because they don’t like it. It starts with ‘I’m stressed and I’m tired and I’m not interested right now’ and it turns into what I call a ‘scavenger hunt’.
If your relationship is not having sex, the worst thing you can do is to leave your partner. Chasing them will increase their anxiety and slow down their brakes.
3. Stop focusing on sex
If you want to speed up your sex life, you need to stop making sex your goal. Instead, he tells us to focus on building relationships. Agree that you and your partner will go for a while without sex, she says. Once the pressure is off, you will have the opportunity to be intimate in other ways. When you’re on a sex break, set aside time each day to cuddle and kiss. Hugs and kisses may seem trivial, but they are a great way to create a relationship. Plus, they will reduce stress and make you both want to have sex.
It strengthens the bond and the feeling that you are safe and in love with this person. It also creates physical effects in relationships that are non-starters.
4. See a sex therapist
Couples who are close friends should be able to do these activities to build intimacy. If this is difficult for you and your partner, it is recommended that you consult a therapist who can help you. The first advice is always to find a sex therapist because we are all sensitive and sensitive about sex, and it can be difficult to talk about it in a way that does not blame and never hurt.